No Big Deal (NBD)

The 2013 Raised By Wolves Early Arrival Crew.
The 2013 Raised By Wolves Early Arrival Crew.


I arrived in the dessert with 6 people to build a camp for 25 people.

We drove very slowly from Portland, Oregon.  Our trailers were overloaded. On the way up Mt. Hood, the coolant in the Suburban boiled, then the engine quit.

We slept in a hotel for six hours and ate bagels somewhere in Oregon.

I jumped around in the front seat of the van when we got close.

We stopped at the Will Call booth to pick up tickets.

I hugged a woman older than my mom who flirted with me, made me jump over a line in the sand and ring a giant bell. She pulled me close and welcomed me Home.

I built a camp with a hundred feet of fencing, two 8-foot fire totems, an open air shaded café, a geodesic dome, a shade structure for 18 tents, a shower, an Evapotron, and a full functioning kitchen in 2 and half days, with 8 other people.

I met a few guys from Canada who were building a swing set in the desert.

I said thank you when people wandered up to our camp before the gates opened and said “Nice job.”

I ate dust.

I rode my bike to the Man and stopped at a metal coyote, climbed it’s flank and banged on it with my ring in time with mallets and feet, making music for the fun of it.

I took a shot of tequila from a stranger and swung on adult size playground rings, and got sick to my stomach.

I drank water.

I went to a bondage and suspension workshop and got bored, so I left.

I had amazing dusty sex on a blow up mattress in my tent while others talked a few feet away.

We served over 300 cups of coffee on Tuesday, and just as many all week every morning.

A camp member built a solo temple topped with a howling woof made from reclaimed wood, it was beautiful.

I served coffee wearing short shorts, a vest, drag eye makeup and facepaint.

Diplo came to get some coffee even though he doesn’t drink it, he introduced himself as Wes and said he was DJing a set of roots reggae.

K9 cops came to the camp and took photos with our temple and wolf effigy.

I rode the desert in a group of 20 led by an extended fork tricycle with a glowing wolf head.

I danced through a dust storm with new friends, while fire columns shot into the sky and warmed us.

A tooth brushing station appeared out of the dark and dust and dancing people, I brushed my teeth with tens of others, rinsed my mouth, and saved my toothbrush for another day.

I slept in a hammock suspended from a geodesic dome with 12 other people.

I was found in the hammock by friends and followed them to an air-conditioned tent with a water cooler filled with sakè.

I made jokes with my sweetie in the faux fur floor in the air-conditioned tent.

I cooked pesto pasta with three close friends for 25 campers, and we all sat down together to eat and drink and talk about our day.

I went on a date. We rode through a whiteout and discovered a 40-foot tall dancing lady, an oversized swimming fossil, a closed movie theatre, a gypsy caravan pulled by a skeleton metal horse, a temple held together by wood and will, a cock box, and a big cat scratch.

I saw a blow job in the cloud forest.

I watched two people fuck on a giant motorized green elephant.

I danced.

Oh yeah, I danced.

I breathed dust.

I stood on top of a three-story house car from another time.

I rode my bike into the walk-in camping area and saw the desert.

I broke a plate at a glass garden.

I accepted a margarita.

I accepted a Thai Ice Coffee.

I accepted an Iced Coffee.

I accepted a popsicle from an 8-year old and gave him a necklace.

I watched the sun set.

I asked for directions from the Department of Misinformation, they told me misinformation and asked to see me naked.

I was given a can of beer by a robot.

I saw the sunset.

I walked through a front porch to a kitchen to the desert.

I slept in the cloud forest for three hours before sunrise until a small woman tripped over me, and then I roared.

I saw sunrise with four of my loves, P. Diddy was somewhere nearby eating a hot dog.

I slept until noon.

I rode the desert alone.

I took a cockcicle from a stranger on the back of a two-story art car playing jazz.

I found the Tin Man in the desert and read quotes from Malcolm X, MLK and others, and I cried.

I rode to camp and stewed in anger and frustration.

I shit dust.

I had a fight with my sweetie, she loved me anyway.

I saw a giant man burn with 20 of my best friends.

I found a giant gay sheep car and friends from SF.

I pulled a solo temple and wolf effigy to the dessert with 20 friends and burned it with the embers of the burned man.

I took down a geodesic dome, two shade structures, a shower, and my tent with 20 other people in 15 hours.

I slept in the passenger seat of a truck while the driver slept behind the wheel and it took 8 hours to hit pavement.

I miss the dust.

Raised By Wolves before the burning of Lobo Madre.
Raised By Wolves before the burning of Lobo Madre. (Photo by Nate Caretaker)






One Response to “No Big Deal (NBD)”
  1. steven mentor

    I dug this. I loved the lists. I instantly wanted to write something. I had a great great time last year and this made me remember it. I thought of how many people right this minute could read this and go, hells yeah, and start their own epic list. Thanks.


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